Parenting Critics
I had an interesting trip to Home Depot today. I went in looking for painters canvas, and came out with a compost bin. Had I know that buying a compost bin would have put my parenting skills into question I would have left the thing there.
The bin, in the box, wouldn’t fit under the cart. Callum was sitting in the main part of the cart, so I took him out, put the box in and then asked if he wanted to walk or ride. He opted to ride, next to the box.
I wander to the til and am confronted by a Home Depot employee giving me shit for letting Callum stand in the cart and telling him to sit down. I’m at the stupid self-serve thing (why, oh why, do they force this on us?) trying to figure out how to scan said box and am in no mood for a lecture. Besides, the kid CAN’T sit, there’s no room due to said box. Callum is being incredibly good, just standing there, chatting, doing his thing. I say to the home depot that Callum obviously can’t sit, but he keeps beaking off at me, so I ignore him.
Then a Home Depot cashier comes to help and I ask her for hand-held scanner, which she assures me she has, then she starts moving the box. I ask why, and apparently she is going to move it under the cart. Huge sigh on my part, and I let her know that it doesn’t fit, I already tried that. More drama about Callum (who is STILL, patiently standing there, doing as he is told, and watching the action).
Finally she just scans my order and off to the car we go. Claire is pretty upset by this point because during the til fiasco she couldn’t see me behind the box and we’re going through a phase. So I ask Callum if he’s cool or if he wants to get in the car first. He says “No, Claire first”.
Of course, some random passerby is now concerned that Callum is going to suddenly jump out of the cart and break open his skull so she starts talking to Callum. Whatever, I buckle Claire in and while I’m buckling random stranger asks Callum if he wants out of the cart, and then TAKES HIM OUT OF THE CART. Some strange, albeit kind, woman thought it was ok to pick up my son.
Now, say what you will about kids standing in the main part of the shopping cart but let me first say this: I know my own child. Yes, kids do fall head first out of those carts, and yes, so could Callum. And let me just say that if that day comes, I will eat my words, but right now, at this stage in his life, Callum isn’t that kid. He isn’t a climber, he isn’t a kid who would be fooling around and cause the cart to topple. He is, in fact, THE MOST CAUTIOUS KID I KNOW. I wasn’t being non-chalent and careless, I knew damn well he was safe. In fact, more safe in the cart than me trying to keep tabs on him in a parking lot. And certainly safe enough that random stranger need not pick him up.
I’m telling this tale to Steve and he says “you’re not going to get sympathy from me, I’m all about safety first”. Yet again someone else is going to do it better. I point this out to Steve, and inquire where exactly would Callum be if not in the cart? Running around a parking lot that’s where. In a very busy store with a lot of strangers who could knock him over, or run into him with a cart, or if you’re a fear mongerer, abduct him. The chances of him falling out of the cart? Pretty flippin’ slim, especially considering I’m assessing the situation (if he started to act out, I would have taken him out of the cart, obviously) and like I’ve already mentioned, I KNOW MY OWN CHILD.
Then it’s “well, you should leave the big purchases for the weekend”. Right, so I’m going to not buy water for our water cooler until the weekend? I’m not ever going to buy, say, A LOT of cereal? The list of things I do without Steve is huge, I don’t think he even recognizes it, and let me tell you, he would NOT be all that keen to suddenly doing it all on the weekend because god forbid, Callum be forced to sit in the main part of a shopping cart.
So, the next time you think you can parent better than the parent? Tell yourself to fuck off. I’m serious. You probably can’t parent their child better (unless, say, they’re obviously drunk, and in that case, you probably could)
10 Responses to “Parenting Critics”
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I think you should go and get drunk!!! Or at the very least, a glass of wine on the deck….but please ensure said children are within catching distance or a wild cougar might run off with them.
Maybe you could put them in a cart
I’m in LOVE with you right now…I couldn’t agree more! Lukas is like Callum and I would have no issues doing what you did. God, however, decided there was no possible way I was going to get 2 children like that and made Jonah the climber. The kid can’t walk yet but seems to think climbing in and out of things is his preferred method of entertainment
And where does that woman get off lifting Callum out of the cart?? Seriously! I would’ve probably been up on assault charges if that had been my kid and someone just decided to lift him out of the cart, good intentions or not.
I don’t normally comment and I can’t really picture the cart and the kid standing in it so I don’t have a feel for the hazard. But, it seems like your end of the argument boils down to 1) you know your kid and 2) he’s very cautious by nature.
Have to tell you, I adore both your kids, but I don’t think Callum is any more or less cautious than any other like aged child that I’ve observed. And anyways, isn’t this just another way for you to say that your not yet 3 year old is “special”. Aren’t you the first one to harp against parents making claims like that?
At any rate, life makes you take a short cut every once in a while, Steve is just probably hoping the short cuts aren’t the norm
Never said there aren’t a whole lot of other cautious kids his age, just of the kids I know, he’s the most cautious (in his age group, anyway). Most of my friends boys would climb out of the cart, grantd the girls wouldn’t, right now (although at this point Claire would climb out, she also needs to be strapped in whereas Callum never did). So, those folks don’t put their kids in there because they know not to.
My point is, chances are the parent knows what they are doing…
DUDE. When you got to the part about the stranger taking him out of the cart? I about FREAKED OUT. How did uber-cautious Callum respond to a stranger picking him up? I was waiting to read about you chewing the woman a new one.
Also, obviously, I’m 100% on your side and Steve needs a smack upside the head. Grr.
Amen, sister!
He was just sort of “huh. this is interesting…”. Here’s hoping that if she turned around and walked away the kid would’ve screamed.
Go smack Steve-o for me. I’m with you all the way – you just need 3 to really make scene of it!
Ugh, that is so annoying! I hate it how people feel it’s okay to just inject themselves into a situation.
I guess I SORT OF understand– if I thought a kid was going to get hurt and the mom was oblivious, I might say something, too (though I’d NEVER just grab someone’s kid, eeeeeeekkkkk! The woman MIGHT have lost a limb over that one!) Not that you’re oblivious at ALL, but SO MANY WOMEN are.
Judgmental of me, I guess, but I’m like super cautious overprotective mom, and I see danger everywhere. When I was 7 my mom used to let me ride wherever the hell I wanted on my bike, even on a highway, and even AT THE TIME, that scared me shitless but I did it anyway. She was.. umm… one of those oblivious moms.