Occupation: wife

A friend of mine recently started a new business out of her home and as a result has been finding out about a lot of women who are running small business ventures from home.  She’s been sharing her findings with a bunch of us,  mostly on facebook, so as I am looking at the page suggestions and reading about these women’s businesses I often read the “About” section.

Inevitably, because we’re talking about women with young families making a small income while they are at home with their kids, a lot of these blurbs look the same – “I’m a wife and mother, working from home” or “I’m Mama to the most wonderful kid in the world” or “Mom to Joe-Bob and Bobbie-Joe and wife to Bob-Boy!!!!!!”.

These blurbs almost always make me cringe and for a long time I couldn’t really tell you why.  I mean, I’m a Mom of three who works from home.  It’s exactly what my own bio would say.  In fact, when I was introduced to the company that I do work for it was noted that I would be working at home while juggling my young family.  I don’t have a right to be irritated by these bios, I am these bios.

Then it hit me yesterday as I was browsing yet another home-based business.  What bugs me isn’t that these women are identifying themselves as mothers.  It’s the ones that identify themselves and mothers and wives.  It’s the “I’m a wife and mother” that irks me (and let me just apologize up front to my friends who have used this phrase.  I still think you’re all awesome!).

Not that I have anything against wives.  I’m a wife.  The problem is that when that is written in a bio on a business page, it makes me think that “wife” is some sort of job that needs special mentioning, or even that it is some sort of status symbol.  Mother doesn’t bother me, though, because   let’s face it, “mother” (and father) is a job and does need to be mentioned.   Being a mother means that there is a very good chance that I might not get back to you within a nano-second of you phonnig or emailing me.  It means that while I take your call, there might be screaming going on in the other room.   It means that I am probably doing the bulk of my work at 2 am. Parenting is work,  and we are basically employed by our children for at least a little while. 

But wife?  Wife isn’t a job.  Being a wife shouldn’t influence your at-home business.  Having kids does, sure, because all day long you’re going to be dealing with the wee rottens and work might have to take a back seat.  That’s worth mentioning.  But if your wifely duties interfere with your business then, well, I’m glad I’m not married to your husband.

 I don’t work for Steve.  Yes, I am at home full time.  Yes, I consider it my job to wash the dishes and do the laundry (although I’ve always considered the fact that I do Steve’s laundry to be a nice gesture and not actually a part of my own job description).  Keeping the house (relatively) clean?  My job right now, sure.  But  Steve and I are partners in life and together we work at our relationship and our family, he’s not the boss.  Even if he might like it to be so.

Not that I think all these women need to update their bios, but I am curious why people feel like it is necessary to mention their wifely status.  Enlighten me!

wordless wednesday::wood sprites, fairies and hallowe’en

a little sweet wood sprite

the littlest wood sprite

lookimg for fairies

obligatory halloween pic ture